You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Randomize
