I hate all girls vehemently.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Randomize
