3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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