do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
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