Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize
