It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
