so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
