and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Randomize