return my video game
dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Randomize
