Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Randomize
