that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
There's even glitter on my cock...
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