did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
