I want to stick my p in your. b.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
