Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Randomize