Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
