Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
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