I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
When are your genitals available?
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Randomize
