Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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