Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
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