Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Randomize
