She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize