is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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