i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
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