There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
I think I sprained my soul last night
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
