Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
