awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Randomize
