I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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