Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Randomize
