Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
