Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
