Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
