I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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