dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Houston, we have a blender
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
