I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
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