This dress was meant to end up on your floor
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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