My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
