these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Randomize
