I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
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