On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
only if we run a train.
done.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
