In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
