Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
