The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
I just cut my nipple shaving
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Randomize
