So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
