if you like me you must not know who I am
Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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