Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
