Midget sex pt 2 tonight
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
