Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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