So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
