Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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