How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
