margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Be still, my beating vagina.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
