so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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